Funny Game – Sachin’s Bat

Hey All. Good morning / good afternoon / good evening. Please feel free to take any one of the above depending on when you decide on reading this post.

Disclaimer: This post is mostly fictional and is my attempt to write something sarcastically funny.

Yet another season of IPL (Indian People’s league as quoted by the estranged Latit Modi) passes by. Following are the observations which I made on the season three of IPL.

Sachin’s Bat

It is somehow proved that Sachin Tendulkar is second only to the monsoons when it comes to cricket in India. It has also been agreed by everyone that there is something magical about Sachin. This has been further validated when Harbhajan Singh claimed after his valiant knock against the Deccan Chargers that it was Sachin’s bat that did the trick.

Although this was seen as a one off odd incident, it was taken very seriously by a few.

Andrew Symonds was quick to remark that next time around he will start sledging Sachin’s bat.

Shane Warne in one of his s.m.s. which he accidently messaged to Ravi Shastri said that the nightmares-of-sachin quip was not true. But he did admit that he was scared about Sachin’s bat.

Patrick Pavanasam, a die hard Sachin fan, was very vehement in his protest. He spoke thus to the evening news “This is not the first time someone uses Sachin’s bat to claim fame.” He them went on to narrate a story in which a guy used a stolen bat of Sachin to woo his lady love. He added that “It’s a pity that Sachin has to go through such torture. but not for long. I am raising a petition with the ICC demanding that the runs that are scored with Sachin’s bat be added to Sachin’s run tally. Once the petition is cosidered all Sachin fans will be relieved and there will be rain in India during the summers”.

While poor Patrick was voicing his concerns, BCCI officials had other plans. They shipped the Indian team to the Caribbean with truckloads of bats Sachin used. This was done to boost India’s chances at the T20 World-cup. While all this was happening a leaked email send from one BCCI official to another demanded that Harbhajan Singh be credited for innovating with Sachin’s bat. His contract salary was increased by ten percent. Shortly after this another email was leaked which suggested that Harbhajan has delayed in coming out with this revelation and hence he should be fined 10 percent of his contract salary.

Amazed by the news surrounded Sachin’s bat, Indian Sport Minister M.S. “who are you?” Gill suggested that Indian Hockey will be better off if they start using Sachin’s bat.

may or may not continue ….

Wimbledon – 2009

The tennis ball is finally back to the green turf after toiling in clay.

Wimbledon is back.The coming forth night is the most sought after for the simple reason that the record books could be rewritten. And the crown had a high chance of returning to the guy they call Federer.

Federer is still not the player of 2006 or 2007.  But Federer being Federer, is still the player to beat, especially when it comes to grand slams. The last 20 odd grand slams show how consistent Federer has been. To add to it, the French open victory would have done his confidence a lot of good.  And this time around there is no Nadal to push Federer. He is having an amazing comeback. If everything goes well we could

Nadal’s injury forced exit from the most famous and oldest of grand slams leaves us wondering whom to blame for this. It’s bad for the prestigious tournament to not have the number one playing it. Doubly bad as he is the one who is the one supposed to defend. We can blame the thick schedule imposed by ATP and keep quiet. But I wouldn’t do that for the simple reason that every player has a choice to pick which all ATP events he wants to appear. And here I would only blame Nadal and his team for getting the number one player’s current state.

Surely Nadal will be missed for his energy and never say die attitude. He is the only person who can push Federer to a state where Federer starts to play like human. I wish Nadal does speedy recovery and comes back and puts a fight at the US Open, and may be make 2009 a year to remember for more than one record.

Andy Murray has been the second best player in the circuit if ATP points are to be considered. But he is yet to win a grand slam. May be with the crowd support he can muster, he has a very good chance.

Djokovic did promise a lot with his Australian open victory last year, but after that it has been not that great for him. I wish he stops playing the Joker and concentrates on playing the best tennis.

Andy Roddick is doing a pretty good job, but he is still not there. His biggest enemy will be his attitude. His progress will be determined by how well he can keep his cool. His outburst at the French open is something we don’t need from a player of his caliber.

Del Porto is yet another player to look out for. He could well be in the semis.

So guys get glued to the TV sets. For we have either history in the making.(Roger winning his 15^th slam) or we will have a new player emerge as a champion which is good for the game as we see only Nadal and Federer winning at slams (if we don’t count the 2008 Australian open and 2005 Australian open).

My bets are on Federer bettering  Sampras’ record. Roger that!